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Kawan jemaah bernama Sani
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Don’t worry, be happy
For those who have had the opportunity to study in
the United States, it is common for students there to
enrol for one or more
courses offered during summer school.
I registered
for a five-week course in Fundamentals of Psychology while studying at Syracuse
University in New York many years ago.
One of the
topics taught and discussed in the class was on psychology of worry.
What does
worry mean?
The Oxford Advanced Learner’s
Dictionary defines worry as to keep thinking about unpleasant things that might happen or about problems that you have.
A good advice on methods of healthy living with regards to worry can be
found in the book written by Bob Adams, The
Everything Time Management Book.
He simply said: “Don’t worry about things that are beyond your control.
Let go. Unnecessary worry only creates unnecessary anxiety. You are likely to
adopt an overall feeling of helplessness, which may spill over into your other
activities”.
It would be beneficial to get ideas from famous authors who had written
books on this subject.
One such author was Dale Carnegie who gained fame with his book, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living. Two
of worry-related rules, as mentioned in his book, can be used as evergreen
examples:
Rule 1: Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let expect it. A
businessman in Texas felt bitter for his 40 employees did not say “Thank You”
to him after receiving a bonus of about US$300 each for Christmas.
According to Carnegie, instead of wallowing in resentment and self-pity,
that man might have asked himself why he didn’t get any appreciation.
Maybe he underpaid and overworked his employees. Maybe they considered a
Christmas bonus not a gift, but something they had earned. Maybe he was so
critical and unapproachable that no one dared or cared to thank him.
On the other hand, maybe the employees were selfish, mean and
ill-mannered. Maybe this. Maybe that. According to Carnegie, this man made the very
human and distressing mistake of expecting gratitude. He just didn’t know human
nature.
Rule 2: When fate hands us a lemon, let’s try to make lemonade.
In order for us to live a simple and happy life, we should strive to
follow the principle of worrying less about what the others think, say and do.
[as published in New
Straits Times, LETTERS column, page 18
Saturday, 14 February
2015]
24 Rabiulakhir 1436H